guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Just high enough for therapy.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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