in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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