I got chris browned last night
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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