woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Can you bring me the toilet please
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
