Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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