I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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