Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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