Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
