The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
