make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
