id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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