It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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