Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
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Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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