Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize