ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
