i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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