HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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