Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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