Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
