when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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