Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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