At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I think I sprained my soul last night
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
