O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
