My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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