he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
