what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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