we have officially lost it.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
