if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
