This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
