a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
It was confusing and full of hummus
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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