matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Randomize