Do you still have your period?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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