none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i permit you to call me
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize