It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
