At least make sure they are 18
Why
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
