Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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