And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
He better not be in your backpack
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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