capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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