when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
