i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
He has the fingertips of a God
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize