I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I think I have vodka in my lungs
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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