Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
