in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
