Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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