Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
