ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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