hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
