just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
