I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
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