I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
