i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize