I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
