HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Randomize
