I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
My pussy is not your playground.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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